Wandering round doing displacement stuff. This is very difficult, to finally break the thread.

Taking it all down, packing it away, out of sight is almost impossible today. I sit and stare at it all, the sketchbooks, the PowerPoint.

I'm about to be exposed....................my inner mind's eye reviewed and assessed for sensitivity and visualisation. How do I feel about this now? Is it good enough? Could I have done more? better? differently?

This is just wallowing.....................................think..............................logistics!

Get on with it.............

still packing

Today my colleague is finishing these panels ready to take with me. It's tricky work, sewing such delicate silks.

Thank you Caroline :)

I feel so unsettled just now, my chest is tight, can't sleep, walk around with lists.................I'm now looking forward to the 7.5 hour ferry trip from Oban to Lochboisdale this Sunday. Time to think, watch for whales, read and sleep. Should be a beautiful sail, if it stays calm!

another reason for missing home

This is my son in New Zealand last year, when he was away travelling. I missed him.

He's back now :)

I think he feels differently to me about Arran.

Reflecting

I have hundreds of photos of my shoreline, when I feel homesick, I look at them again. As you can see, the mountain one was a photo I didn't take!

It's interesting to look at different shorelines in Scotland, all beautiful in their own distinctive way, full of memories. The land you see here is Kintyre, out to the west.

These are better pictures of where I'm going this weekend; Lochmaddy.

They show the gallery where I'm exhibiting as well, Taigh Chearsabhagh Heritage and Art Centre, a cultural hub of the islands. I've stayed in the artist's flat before, the sea laps the building walls at high tide :)

As you can see, it's a very special place.

My sketchbook is absolutely essential and is an integral part of all this.

The other image shows part of the process of creating the sea silks. Time plays a very important part in all of this. And patience................................

Maybe I should talk a bit about why I work the way I do.

It's all process driven rather than by an abstract concept. The actual processes involved take quite a while to work through, with several variations along the route to finding the answer. Some of these textile processes I've learned, others are adapted from different disciplines. Usually, there isin't a correct way to attempt an idea's visualisation, you just have to try it and see what comes.

With this body of work, spanning several years, there have been many dead ends where I just became bogged down with no where to go. Being alert to possibilities helps, not knowing where solutions come from or when to expect them.

I do keep a running sketchbook as a documentation of all the work's progress; I forget things :)

It's also good as a teaching tool as well as almost speaking for itself. In a fire, I'd grab it before my laptop...........well...............almost.

So why do it?

Curiosity. That burning question.............I wonder what happens if I.....................?

Makes for dull company unless you happen to be driven too.

I wouldn't change any of it and would do it all again.

taking down

Today I started dismantling the work for the exhibition, I leave for North Uist at the weekend.
This feels sad, yet it is time to move on with new work now. It's been a huge part of my life for over 2 years, part of my daily vision, so to have it disappear is difficult. It leaves a very large space, quite literally, in my studio which now needs to be filled with new thoughts and journeys.

Very very careful packing needed!

networking

Lochmaddy, North Uist,
Outer Hebrides

Glen Coe

A great day yesterday in Edinburgh, talking the talk with a fellow artist. We all work in such self imposed isolation, forgetting that a different yet empathic perspective always helps us to move forwards.

Thanks Jenny! Good inspiration.

My colleague Joanne Kaar does the same for me too: so far away.

Thanks Joanne!

This week I have to dismantle the work in my studio to take up to Taigh Chearsabhagh, North Uist.

Mixed feelings now, I lived with this inner world for so long, moving among the suspended silk. Will the studio echo?

The journey north is daunting, not a good time to travel with delicate cargo. Here's hoping for a heatwave, no wind and empty roads.

This is where I place the silk forms, among the seaweed. They can drift away, almost unobserved.

This is what I've been developing recently; almost like vessels. It's still silk, using the same processes but moving it forwards into new forms. I've scorched the silk to create the fragmented appearance.

suspended

This gives an idea of how the work looks when installed in a dedicated space; in this instance, my studio.

shibori

New shapes for me. Working on a much larger scale with silk; scorching, clamping and stitching.

new techniques

I spent some time in Sutherland during the summer of 2008, developing the work, responding to the shoreline way up there. This is the studio Timespan provided for me, the flat there was great. My colleague, Dr Cathy Treadaway, Reader in Creative Practice at UWIC spent a week with me. We worked on our project, I'll talk of this later.

This is more what I need now, delicate, fragile yet strong.

These are quite small, only a few inches high. Made from silk habotai, wax, pigment and metallic threads.

I I used multiple techniques over several days. Time does play an important part in all of this. Patience.

Forming

I'm predominantly a 2D artist, I have problems reversing my car! So working in 3D was seriously challenging. The only way to see my ideas was to make them, over and over, till I managed to get the right sensation. Using silk and its subtle resilience was the right thing to do. Conveying this with grace, was something else again.

Ideas often come at odd times when you least expect it. Struggling to visualise the shadows at the back of your mind, this is the hard part.

This is my studio on Arran as I started exploring the possibilities.

Every day is different on a shoreline. Wind blows, seaweed comes, stones shift, contours alter. New textures and shapes appear.